Green Eggs and Spam

So, I usually get the regular run of the mill crap in my spam box. People leaving “Hey, I like this blog! Buy my shit!” type comments. Very uninteresting. But, in the 435 spam comments I’ve recieved in the past year, there have been a few that stand out – and they’ve been getting better lately! In the spirit of a lazy Monday, following a busy weekend (read: very little WoW time) I don’t have much to talk about, so I’ll do a lazy ass meta post.
There seems to be a trend in “feel good comments.” I guess the spam filters are getting more and more clever, and being able to filter out web addresses put into the comment itself. So, the workaround is to put an innocuous comment and then have your name link back to somewhere that you’re selling things.

Polite Computer Guys 1 and 2: “This blog rocks! I gotta say, that I read a lot of blogs on a daily basis and for the most part, people lack substance but, I just wanted to make a quick comment to say I’m glad I found your blog. Thanks,
A definite great read.. .. – Computer.Dood@computerstore.com” (I got this post twice, from two different user names. It was spam blocked the first time! Thanks for playing, though.)

Polite Console Gamer Person: “Your blog is so informative … ..I just bookmarked you….keep up the good work!!!! – XBOXshitforsale@gmail.com” (Not a console gaming website, but good idea on the cross-niche marketing!)

Polite Sales Lady: “Really nice posts. I will be checking back here regularly. – SalesLady@wikipedia.com” (Wikipedia???)

greeneggs1

Then there’s the more blatant sellers. Some of whom are not obviously native English speakers, lending inadvertant entertainment to my spam-checking activities.

Buy My Book Lady: “OMG you are a great writer! You might want to check out my book. You can buy my autobiography on almost any website that sells books, just search for ISBN # ________ – BookLady@newblogwithoneadvertisingpost.com” (Congratz on using the search WordPress tags and finding “books” here. I did check out the ISBN. It’s really real book but I have *no* idea what it’s about, the author has left a crazy breathless runon comment on Amazon that does not in any way make me want to read her book. Sorry.)

Game Hacker: “Best choice of the week about Crack, Vdts crack, Chem3d crack and War3tft_117a_english crack here http://crack.notakeylogger.iswear.comCrackerHackerNotAKeyLogger@honestly.com” (I was tempted to check this one out and see exactly what cracks were available, but I doubt it’s anything interesting. And I like my keys.)

greeneggs2

And where would a Warcraft blog be without the goldspammers? Ahhh, goldspammers. So much enterainment, so little time. (Bonus points for the broken english.)

Gold Spammer: “used to be? hardcore in wow. but you guys actually farm them yourself? you should check out http://www.ohgodmykeys.comGoldKeySpamLogger@mwahaha.com” (You keep using that punctuation mark. I don’t think it means what you think it means.)

I do honestly feel bad for these guys, because I know that they’re often regular people just trying to make money for their families. I know my job sucks sometimes, but at least I don’t have to spend all day searching for Warcraft related stuff and leaving my Goldspammer droppings everywhere. Which is why I don’t abuse in-game spammers. I just report them. (Also because they’re often automated – no point in abusing a bot.)

The runner up for best spam comment ever is this one, from a foreign interest:

LadyRussia: “Блог отличный. Вручить бы Вам награду за него или просто орден почета. =) – imanokov@CheapComputers.ru” (I plugged that into Babel Fish and got: “[Blog] is outstanding. To entrust to you reward for it or is simple the order of the honor.” Why, thanks! I’m still not going to buy your Eastern Bloc rip off computer equipment.)

GreenEggs3

But, the best spam I have ever gotten (to date) is this:
Pr0nD00d: “Best choice of the month: Creampie, Clit creampie, Creampie mpg and Vagina creampie http://pr0n.popupsatwork.loseyourjob.com/” (I can’t wait to see my search terms now.)

How did that guy even find this place??

Talk to me about your spam comments – I’m a pretty small fish in a pretty big blogging fishbowl, other people must be getting much,much more interesting things than I am.

Friday I’m In Love

growing_heartI love Warcraft a whole lot. (I should think that that would be obvious by now tee hee.) But there are actually other things out there that I love too! Really there are – and there are other things that I make time in my life for (not always the easiest thing – curse you raid schedule! – but I do try). One of the things that I love that is not Warcraft is the PopCap game Plants vs. Zombies.

I’ve been a fan of PopCap since way way way back in my younger days (I can conclusively date my Bejeweled addiction to early Fall, 2001. At least.) I like a lot of their games and I like that you can play them online for free. Fun! Diverting! Why write this biochem paper when I can match animals against the clock? When I was away earlier this summer (Field Season 3: The Search for Scotch) I had no internet connection on site and loads and loads of free time. So when I was back in my hotel room I downloaded the demo versions of all of my favourite PopCap games. And then this new one that sounded like it might be ok.

It was way, way more than ok.

I think I played the 60 minute trial at least four times the first day (I figured out how to re set the settings on my computer so the game would think it was a new trial.) When I got to the hotel that night, I willingly (eagerly!) shelled out the $20 for the full version and it was fabulous!

The little plants are just too damn cute! The gravemuncher “om nom nom” sounds and animations had me totally giggling out loud. And the corn-apults and watermelon-apults were such an unexpected delight. The zombies were hysterically funny and the game play clever and intuitive. It’s pretty much a tower defense game but the way it is packaged is a singularily unique joy. I love the mini games (I’m a big fan of Zombotany and the one where you play as a zombie and nom cardboard plants). The in-game alamanac that has descriptions/biographies of all the plants and zombies is really clever and witty (with only one concern – what the hell is with the vast, vast majority of all the plants and zombies being male?) The little Zen Garden mini game you can acess after playing through the game once is pretty cool too because it lets you collect all the plants – awesome!

I used this site for some good advice (yes, I hacked my game to give me lots of money. *shifty eyes*). GameFAQs has a few other good resources, to. There’s also a PvZ wiki! Otherwise it’s pretty straightforward and addiciting gameplay. One piece of advice: using garlics to channel the assault into the middle three rows is a pretty solid strategy.

Two last things about PvZ – 1) Check the music video out here. So catchy! 2) PopCap has my undying gratitude for their way of dealing with this shit (which disgusts me on several levels – as a gamer, an internet surfer, a female, a human being with more than two functioning brain cells.)

I love Plants vs. Zombies. And I’m not the only one!

Post Scriptum: I have heard that the makers of the crappy game linked above (I’m not providing them with any extra advertising. All my links go to sites that are criticising their shittacular ad campaing) are associated with gold spammers/farmers/sellers. I can’t find the link atm, but I metion it just in case you needed an additional reason to not give them your clicks, links or money.

Post Post Scriptum: Tomorrow is (yay!) Talk Like A Pirate Day! (In addition to Caturday) There is even an in game event, so don’t miss out! Arrr, ye salty gopher!